Forgiveness breaks all bounds of repression and depression. It liberates the psyche from bondage to the past.
In fact, I would rank forgiveness as the essence of psychotherapy.
As human beings all our limitations arise from our psychic wounding. This wound has been either intentional or accidental, but it drains our vitality. In fact, if it has been grievous enough, it runs our whole life, and ruins it.
We are creatures designed to absorb and transmit love, and when an unloving act is foisted on us, when someone or something casts a shadow on our capacity to love, we bleed.
War zones, jails, and insane asylums are where the wounded gather. This is where society sends its broken souls. Those who regain their capacity to love will emerge from these places of grief. Those who remain bitter will forever be incarcerated in them, whether or not they have been physically freed.
Those who are whole and well are dedicated to their capacity to love. They cannot kill, hurt, injure or maim another because they have not lost their capacity to see themselves as the other. Ideals do not sway them to injure others, no matter how vaulted the traditions in which those ideals are espoused. No ideal transcends their ideal to be of love and service to their brethren.
The cure for overcoming psychic wounding is to forgive. When we forgive, we pardon; we express mercy; and we liberate our own kindness.
When you forgive, you give forth your power of love to heal the image, memory, or person that distorted your self-image and gave you the false belief that you have been diminished, disempowered, and disenfranchised.
It is the wounded who strike out and wound others. It is the shadow of their own pain that they cast upon others. It is their unlovingness that they extend out of their crippled psyche. They become conduits for the poison that they themselves despise.
All forms of malice, ill-will and cruelty, euphemized in the name of some lofty ideal, come forth from those who speak in the names of righteousness; the crucifixion of Christ could not have come about except for the distorted sense of what is right by the persecutors.
If an act is unloving, no ideal can justify it, for to wound another is to wound ourselves. We create pathos in our wake. We spill grief before us.
How to forgive the unforgivable? How to release the sword of ill-will thrust into our hearts? How to break free of the resentment that has bound our tormentors these many years?
You do it by simply understanding that to for give is a healing for you. It is breaking the karmic bonds. It is an act of self-loving. Forgiveness heals pity, brings reconciliation to that which is broken within, and makes healing possible.
An act of forgiveness can be silent. In fact, it has little to do with the other person. They may or may not feel the psychic release as you drop your smoldering anger, nourished over more years than you care to remember.
When you forgive, you release...you release yourself. You release your attachment to pain. You release your aversion to the act done to you. And when you do this, something magical happens. You set yourself free.
It is never about whether the other person or event deserves your forgiveness. It is about your going free from your own web of negativity. When you forgive, you staunch the bleeding. When you forgive, you open up your heart and regain your capacity to love. And when you learn to love, your life opens up like a glorious dream. The question, ultimately, is never whether you should or should not forgive...instead the question is always this: do you deserve to be happy right now by letting it go.
- Saleem Rana, M.Sc., Psychotherapist in Denver, Colorado. - http://www.psychic101.com/healing-power-forgiveness.html
Aisaretai demo aisou to shinai Sono kurikaeshi no naka wo samayotte Boku ga mitsukata kotae wa hitotsu kowakutatte kizutsuitatte Suki na hito ni wa sukitte tsutaerunda
Anata ga boku wo aishiteru ka aishitenai ka Nante koto wa mou docchi demo ii n da Donna ni negai nozomou ga Kono sekai ni wa kaerareru mono ga takusan aru darou Sou soshite boku ga anata wo aishiteru to iu jijitsu dake wa Dare ni mo kaerareru shinjitsu dakara
Sen no yoru wo koete anata ni tsutaetai Tsutaenaka naranai koto ga aru Aisaretai demo aisou to shinai Sono kurikaeshi no naka wo samayotte Boku ga mitsukata kotae wa hitotsu kowakutatte kizutsuitatte Suki na hito ni wa sukitte tsutaeru n da Kimochi wo kotoba ni suru no wa kowai yo demo Suki na hito ni wa sukitte tsutaeru n da
Kono hiroi sekai de meguri au yorokobi wo kotoba jya ii arawasenai ne Dakara bokutachi wa hohoemi Iro azayaka ni sugiru aki wo doremi de utatte Fuyu wo se ni haru no komorebi wo machi Atarashiku umare kawaru dareka wo mamoreru youni to
Kita michi to yukisaki furikaereba itsudemo okubyou na me wo shite ita boku Mukiaitai demo sunao ni narenai Massugu ni aite wo aisenai hibi wo Kurikaeshite wa hitoribocchi wo iyagatte Ano hi no boku wa mukizu na mama de hito wo aisou to shite ita
Sen no yoru wo koete ima anata ni ai ni yukou Tsutaenaka naranai koto ga aru Aisaretai demo aisou to shinai Sono kurikaeshi no naka wo samayotte Boku ga mitsukata kotae wa hitotsu kowakutatte kizutsuitatte Suki na hito ni wa sukitte tsutaeru n da Sono omoi ga kanawanakutatte suki na hito ni sukitte tsutaeru Sore wa kono sekai de ichiban suteki na koto sa
[English Translation]
I want to be loved, but you don’t seem to love me I wander within that repetition I found one answer; that even if I’m scared, even if I’m hurt I can say “I love you” to the person who I love
Do you love me? Or not love me? As for things like that, it’s already fine either way No matter how I wish There are many unchangeable things in this world, right? That’s right, and because only the fact of my loving you Is the truth unchangeable by anyone
I want to overcome the thousands of nights and tell it to you There’s something that I must tell you I want to be loved, but you don’t seem to love me I wander within that repetition I found one answer; that even if I’m scared Even if I’m hurt, I can say “I love you” to the person who I love It’s scary to turn my feelings into words But I can say “I love you” to the person who I love
In this broad world, I can’t express the joy of encountering you with words So we smile, sing about the vividly passing autumn in do-re-mi Turn our backs on winter, wait for the sunlight streaming through trees in spring And become reborn anew, so that we can protect someone
On the path we came from and our destination, when we looked back, I’d always have timid eyes I want to face you, but I can’t be honest I, who repeated days of not being able to straightforwardly love my partner And hated being alone on that day Seemed to love people while unwounded
I’ll overcome the thousands of nights and go meet you now There is something that I must tell you I want to be loved, but you don’t seem to love me I wander within that repetition I found one answer; that even if I’m scared Even if I’m hurt, I can say “I love you” to the person who I love Even if those thoughts aren’t fulfilled, I can say “I love you” to the person who I love It’s the most wonderful thing in this world
Haha. I've nothing to do already. And it's freaking 6am. Zzz
So got nothing to do, and i went into Google and typed 'Shamin'. lol Den there's alot of results, as usual.
Sadly, 'Shamin' is a common name used for girls. Sob sob
And then there's SHAMIN-TV from Japan (wtf)
Some stupid ppl dunno how to spell 'Shaman' in 'Shaman King' and typed 'Shamin King' instead. lol. Stupid but it flatters me abit. haha
Den there's this UK terrorist 'Shamin Uddin'
The largest hotel operator in Virginia, USA 'Shamin Hotels Inc.' http://www.shaminhotels.com/
Pokemon Diamond 'Shaymin', but some said 'Shamin' so i dunno which is right
Shamin Hospitality Group, 2000 Ware Bottom Spring Rd, Chester, VA 23836
Beelshamên, or Baal-Shamin (Syrian Semitic), supreme god of pre-Islamic Palmyra in ancient Syria. Literally, 'the lord of the heavens'
LOL!
So funny, but it's so nice, seeing as how my name came out often on the web, coz my name's not commonly known and used. But i'm so proud that my name's unique.
I can't believe i'm so lazy to blog. But if i blog i have many things to say, but that'll be IF i got the mood to type it out. Lol (I'm an IT student, yet i'm lazy to type. lol)
Wat shld i do? Close this blog? Nope, i think i shld go take a look at Cuihui's blog. She wrote too much, but it somehow motivates me to blog more. Haha I'm nuts, in a very weird way. lol XDD
Okay, today was hellish, but cool. Oka-san(Mum) and nii-san(my 1st bro) went to Johore together wif my uncle, aunt etc. They got some wedding invitation, but i'm too lazy to go, and there's not enough space for me in the vehicle. lol
So left wif me, my 2nd sis, my 2nd bro, oto-san(dad) and my nieces. Felt so quiet. The funny part is, that dad went to do all the household chores. Includes, cooking, washing plates, throw rubbish. Den sis, who was hungry at night went to buy KFC for supper, so i took 2 pc chicken from her, as well as the coke. lol Coz my nieces can't take much of coke, since they're still kids. haha
Like my mum said ytd, i wanted to live alone, so must not complain complain. lol -_-"
Nvm
But if i were to live alone, i will not still have family members in the house rite? except for occasionally. lol I can really dream of it, living alone, in a house. Whoots!
Putting that aside, i rmb the other time i dreamt that i was smoking. And i was addicted to it, sucking the cigaratte as i reacalled. Den i suddenly thought, 'oh shit, i just smoked. How am i supposed to face everyone?'
Lol
And i still rmb the other time, after last Friday when i finished 2 anime series in just 3 freaking days. HAha! One was 'Otogizoushi' and the other one was 'Saiyuki Reload'. Both are marvelous!
Now i'm watching 'Jigoku Shoujo'(Girl from Hell). I watched it before in Animax channel but that was English dubbed. Now i'm listening to the japanese voices and English Subtitles instead. But the second series, 'Jigoku Shoujo Futakumori'(Hell Girl Second Cage), was more of a hit for the Hell Girl, coz it was the end of her. Sad, and it was a nice, sad story about human grudges and hatred. The soundtracks are melodious, composed by 'Takanashi Yasuharu', and the Credits song, 'Aizome by Noto Mamiko' always brings the sadness to a conclusion in the every episode, which no one can explain it but to just take it as a learning experience for all humans.
'It's not nice having to hold a grudge against anyone around you'.
As for Bleach, i'm gonna make a pause for it, seeing that the current episodes are interesting and left hanging, so i will wait till that 'interesting part' to finish, den i'll download them and watch. lol
Finally updated my songlist. Mayb some of you might wonder why am i listening to weird songs that pop out on my msn personal message etc. Well, it's weird, coz one thing that it's a soundtrack mp3. So the titles won't be familiar to known music industry. And also some japanese songs that i listen, well some of them are on my songlist now, you can check it out anytime you wanna listen. lol
Okay, time to go, i'll need to watch some of Jigoku Shoujo b4 i go to sleep.
Okay, it's finally holiday. Coz that darn Graphic Design Paper finally over and long forgotten. Whoo~!
Time for some content of fun. Hmm let's see.
Wat's my schedule?
Wat shld i do?
Shit!
I dun remember having any schedule. Lol But nvm. I got many many fun games and good animes to watch. Lol.
Ok, i'm getting bored. So tried this game called 'Alien Shooter' It's not those kind of fancy 2D games we used to play in the olden times. This one's kinda 3rd person kind. Equipped wif many guns. Den all you have to do is to just shoot aliens coming towards you. Lol Easy, but requires some skill in the shooting and movement process, as well as avoid aliens and wadever that might end up 'game over'. lol
*yawns*
I love and hate holidays. First thing is that i dun need to go to school. Secondly will be no work to do.
Which means, Cannot meet frens Cannot slack in lecture rooms Slack at home like pig Laptop not used for schoolwork Spending whole day sleeping and self-entertainment Eat eat eat Sleep sleep sleep
HAha! That's crazy, I'M CRAZY~! lol
Too little free time during school feels like doing alot of things. But now that it's very free, dun feel like doing anything. lol
Just spacing out today after came back from band prac. Lol Band suddenly jumped my heart. Haha But everyone is like so sick so sadded. lol
I'm totally feeling blank inside my brain right now. It's like, i'm psychoing myself to go blank. lol
Shit.
I need to make a layout plan for this 3 weeks of boredom. I wanna do something, at least not to make myself waste my time. Sth that will benefit in the future. I feel like working, but wat work would i want and wat will any 'lobangs' have to offer? Sadly to say, i'm those type who's choosy abt wat i'm working as, that's why i'm working hard right now to get the best seat in the house in the working society.
But to say so, nothing in this world is perfect, and you can't earn money just through waiting and slacking. That's wat i hate this world for. Money. If only this world don't make use of money, but instead the amount of good deeds and trust being used as the currency to buy stuffs, wouldn't it be great? But God just doesn't want it that way, it'll be no fun, no climax, just a world with humans doing good deeds everytime just to get a living.
Maybe God IS also playing a GAME out there.
If only he could bring down some of interesting and fun games for me, games of my desire. I guess by saying that no one understands wat kind of desired game is about. Lol. Think only God knows.
It seems like 'emo', but it's not. Coz it doesn't connected to any hurt in my feelings or watsoever shit. Lol
Tmr's performance at Botanic Gardens, but after that?
Nice song man, it's from Bleach, lol. Ever since then, i'ver been crazy about all these Japanese's songs and lyrics and their language. I got so obsessed. Haha
Coz one thing their language seems nice, and i felt like 'love at first sight hear/listening' Lol And what's nicer, i get to reveal the lyrics translation and there it goes, the wonderful and harmonical languages that they used in their songs, i felt so touched by them.
By far this 'Jpop' craze in me is so far one of the best lah, since it's like a new discovery in their music, i totally dun feel a single regret or anything while listening to their songs. Cheers to JPOP! lol
Younha - Touch
Younha - Houki Boshi
Younha - Ima ga Daisuki
Younha - Motto Futari De
That's how 'obsessed' i am. lol Of course, i only like the best of the best, and thanks to those who 'psycho-ed' me. lol I LOVE YOUNHA!!! LOL
Yui - Life
Yui - I Remember You
Omg, Yui is oso as cool. In fact, both are also cool! Haha
UVERworld!!!
Yui!!
Younha!!!
Koike Wentz
(just some of my known Jpop artists. Younha, i can't help liking you! lol)
Okay, apart from those idols, this week has alr been quite tough for me. There were 3 tests, each on tues - thursday. And i didn't slept on wednesday night just to prepare for the stupid VS test. But it went well after that. But i still dunno why i still can't solve the codings. Supposed to be okay, mayb there's sth wrong wif my VS. lol Den there were CCT quiz on tuesday, quite simple actually. And den DCN Test and e-quiz. 1hr on each test. Omg that was a killer. I just dunno why i can't get all the lecture notes into my brain, even though Simon was kind enough to make it an 'open book' test. Turned out he noes that most of us didn't study for the test. Why? too slack. lol
That's standard for us. Haha
But nvm, all those hard work, now it's term break. But there'll be Graphic Design Test next Thursday, so there's plenty of time to study. lol
I didn't slept today. Stupid PMP test makes me worried hell. I can't read through any single shit lecture notes. Just hope it's an open book test, or he just give us some hints or discuss quietly wif the person beside us might be cool. Haha. After this test i'm gonna be so cold and tired. lol
Well, gonna be updating soon, this week alr got 3 unexpected tests No time for updates. Haha
Well it's 2hrs to Death, and 12 hrs to bedtime. LOL
Yes, i am You wanna noe why? Coz home is the safest place, and it has my veri best stuffs kept inside, which is my memories. lol Home got food, drinks, tv, sofa, bed, toilet, etc And most of all, PRIVACY And also i can hide from many outsiders. haha
I can do watever i want I can go around topless and wearing the shortest pants that i have, and no one in the house would care. Haha I can play my own music loudly, and nobody would complain about my taste of music. lol I can eat, play game and talk on the phone at the same time. I can disturb wif my nieces, and ended up getting whacked by them everytime I can cook watever i wan in the kitchen, without even spending and money buying outside food. I can save my clothes to come to school, that is if i stay topless whole day at hm. lol The main thing is, that i dun nid to spend a single cent to almost watever i'm doing at hm, under the shelter of by far the safest and most memorable place in my entire life. Whee~!
ipod/itouch/PSP blue
a pair of good drumsticks
a good Trombone + soft case (seriously)
headphones! the bigger the better lol
personal piano keyboard? lol
